"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for & certain of what we do not see." Hebrews 11:1
I feel like God is reminding me of hope lately. Do I have enough faith? In the midst of trials and storms, am I putting my hope in Him? Am I declaring that truth? Am I shouting that from the mountain tops? Hope is a spiritual gift, one of the three virtues, next to faith and love. I feel as though I need to preach it to myself everyday, my hope in Christ has to be maintained. I have borrowed this definition of Biblical hope from John Piper, "biblical hope is not just a desire for something good in the future, but rather, biblical hope is: a confident expectation and desire for something good in the future." It's saying this will happen!
"We who have run for our very lives to God have every reason to grab the promised hope with both hands and never let go. It's an unbreakable spiritual lifeline, reaching past all appearances right to the very presence of God where Jesus, running on ahead of us, has taken up his permanent post as high priest for us, in the order of Melchizedek." Hebrews 6:18-20 (The Message)
"I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in His Word I hope." Psalm 130:5
I can hope in His Word and find hope in His Word as I wait for Him.
"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope." Romans 15:13
I believe God is mighty and I cling to His promises. Hope and faith are synonymous. Hope looks towards the future, directed by faith. I have so many hopes, esp. now during this season of struggle. I miss my husband desperately and I hope that the Lord can make another way so we can be together. I have hope for children. I have hope that God will use my life for His glory.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Macrobiotics and Me!
Many of you know that Jacob and I started a special diet back in June. We started this because I was really struggling with my health and looking for a natural way to control my stomach disease. Having the disease for 15 years, I was tired of the medicines that were used to treat it. I began to pray again that I could find a "natural way" to control and maybe even put this disease in remission for good. Even my doctor didn't believe this was possible. I began to really pray for an answer from the Lord because I had to do something or I would have to take the drugs the doctor wanted me to take. It has been a long time since I had ordered any new reading on Crohn's, so I typed in the words "Crohn's Disease" on Amazon and there staring back at me was Ginny Harper's book. I ordered it right away, and checked the mail everyday until it arrived. As soon, as it came I didn't put it down. Her story was painfully familiar and Ginny suffered so much through her young adult life, but her father introduced her to the diet and it changed her life. I went to TN and stayed with this wonderful lady who's book was titled, Controlling Crohn's Disease: The Natural Way. She has such a ministry to sick and hurting people. I was overwhelmed by all the stories I heard there of hope and healing. My own health improved dramatically while there, and I finally learned what was causing all of my issues. I felt like my eyes had been opened. Everything I thought about Western medicine was shared by others who had truly been let down by their doctors. People with all kinds of ailments had walked through the doors of Ginny's Center, cancer, stomach issues, weight issues, the list goes on and on.
The word "macro" means full and "bio" means life, full life! Isn't that what God has called us to! Please know that I am not on a soap box of any kind. This diet isn't weird or wacky to us because it makes sense for my body and my health has improved dramatically. Maybe it isn't for everyone because it requires people to drastically change their eating habits. I think the basis of this diet is simple for anyone to follow, everything in moderation, eat with the seasons (no watermelon in winter), and when you are feeling bad "eat in the middle" as much as possible. This means eating whole grains (brown rice, barley, corn, whole oats, etc.), beans, green leafy veggies, and other vegetables. Eat organic as much as you can, avoid refined and processed foods and foods packed with preservatives. There is so much more to all of this, so I will have to blog more about it, but in studying this I have really had my eyes opened to how the food I used to eat affected my health and well-being.
Jacob lost 30 lbs from the diet along with running and he will tell you that he feels amazing! I have my health back and my God to thank for that. I believe 100% that He led us on this path. I have used other alternative things in conjunction with the diet. There isn't a day that I am not praising God for answering my prayer.
The word "macro" means full and "bio" means life, full life! Isn't that what God has called us to! Please know that I am not on a soap box of any kind. This diet isn't weird or wacky to us because it makes sense for my body and my health has improved dramatically. Maybe it isn't for everyone because it requires people to drastically change their eating habits. I think the basis of this diet is simple for anyone to follow, everything in moderation, eat with the seasons (no watermelon in winter), and when you are feeling bad "eat in the middle" as much as possible. This means eating whole grains (brown rice, barley, corn, whole oats, etc.), beans, green leafy veggies, and other vegetables. Eat organic as much as you can, avoid refined and processed foods and foods packed with preservatives. There is so much more to all of this, so I will have to blog more about it, but in studying this I have really had my eyes opened to how the food I used to eat affected my health and well-being.
Jacob lost 30 lbs from the diet along with running and he will tell you that he feels amazing! I have my health back and my God to thank for that. I believe 100% that He led us on this path. I have used other alternative things in conjunction with the diet. There isn't a day that I am not praising God for answering my prayer.
Monday, January 5, 2009
Mary Arlene Walker
Mimi went to be with the Lord on Wednesday December 31, 2008. She had a hard three month battle with stomach cancer. The chemo was especially hard on her precious body and her heart is what finally gave out.
Today, I am reflecting on the blessings of her, her life, and her death. I treasure these things in my heart. I have so many fantastic memories with her. When you have such a young grandmother, she gets to do all kinds of fun things with you. In 2004, mom, Mimi, and me went to Acapulco on a girl's trip together. We had such a great time. She came to Cabo twice with us, I have fond memories of laying by the pool sipping ice tea and reading. She came to see me sing in church, she came to graduations and birthdays (even my most recent July birthday). I even had the sweet blessing of living with her for three months after college. I am reminded in that of what a simple woman she was, loved her bridge ladies, loved Wheel of Fortune and Jag. She was the most amazing grandmother, and I never doubted the love she had for me.
Tuesday morning we were all called into MD Anderson to say our goodbyes. It was surreal, as I thought she would surely beat this disease and be here many more years, but God, in his divine plan had this in mind. I held her sweet hand and saw how the cancer had taken 60 pounds of her and the bruises from IV's and ports all over her arms. I told her how much I loved her and what she meant to me and the legacy she left behind. I told her to go to Jesus. We read Psalm 23 over her. I felt led to read that one in particular, not knowing it was one of her favorites. I know she heard and I pray it was great comfort over her. We prayed over her. We waited. She made it through the day, as the most important people came to say their goodbyes. Wednesday morning at 8:30, she took her last breath and left her frail body to the most wonderful banquet. I know she was greeted by the Lord and given a cancer-free body. I know that she is free from burden and pure as snow. All these things, I have no doubts of.
It was a blessing that we were all in town, my brother and Meredith still on holiday, Jacob here. It is a blessing that I am living with my parents and can support my mother and be there with her. There are so many blessings that come out of this. I know people were blessed by the service, it was beautiful and the Word of God radiated over us. We sung Great is Thy Faithfulness, one of her favorites. Truly, Lord you are great and your mercy is new every day.
I will miss her, her smile, her grace. I will miss the woman that gave so much to this world and to me. I will see her again one day! Rejoice, for she is with her King!
Today, I am reflecting on the blessings of her, her life, and her death. I treasure these things in my heart. I have so many fantastic memories with her. When you have such a young grandmother, she gets to do all kinds of fun things with you. In 2004, mom, Mimi, and me went to Acapulco on a girl's trip together. We had such a great time. She came to Cabo twice with us, I have fond memories of laying by the pool sipping ice tea and reading. She came to see me sing in church, she came to graduations and birthdays (even my most recent July birthday). I even had the sweet blessing of living with her for three months after college. I am reminded in that of what a simple woman she was, loved her bridge ladies, loved Wheel of Fortune and Jag. She was the most amazing grandmother, and I never doubted the love she had for me.
Tuesday morning we were all called into MD Anderson to say our goodbyes. It was surreal, as I thought she would surely beat this disease and be here many more years, but God, in his divine plan had this in mind. I held her sweet hand and saw how the cancer had taken 60 pounds of her and the bruises from IV's and ports all over her arms. I told her how much I loved her and what she meant to me and the legacy she left behind. I told her to go to Jesus. We read Psalm 23 over her. I felt led to read that one in particular, not knowing it was one of her favorites. I know she heard and I pray it was great comfort over her. We prayed over her. We waited. She made it through the day, as the most important people came to say their goodbyes. Wednesday morning at 8:30, she took her last breath and left her frail body to the most wonderful banquet. I know she was greeted by the Lord and given a cancer-free body. I know that she is free from burden and pure as snow. All these things, I have no doubts of.
It was a blessing that we were all in town, my brother and Meredith still on holiday, Jacob here. It is a blessing that I am living with my parents and can support my mother and be there with her. There are so many blessings that come out of this. I know people were blessed by the service, it was beautiful and the Word of God radiated over us. We sung Great is Thy Faithfulness, one of her favorites. Truly, Lord you are great and your mercy is new every day.
I will miss her, her smile, her grace. I will miss the woman that gave so much to this world and to me. I will see her again one day! Rejoice, for she is with her King!
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Gratitude
Thanksgiving, a time to reflect, a time to remember, a time to recall, recount, and recharge.
So many things I am thankful for this holiday, my first holiday with my wonderful husband.
I am incredibly grateful for my health, each day brings new healing, renewal, strength, joy, hope, and perspective. I can't take one day of energy for granted. I feel like a new woman with enough energy to outlast even my husband. God is so good. The Lord has provided people in my life to help me get well, it's amazing!
I am grateful for my family and for my new family. We spent T-day with Jacob's parents this year and his mother and I cooked up a storm. I think we even killed her new ovens. What a sweet memory it will always be, and hopes for many more to come. We each prayed at dinner, and she prayed for my Mimi and cried as she prayed. She is close to my grandmother, as everyone that meets Mimi falls in love with her. Overall, it was a success with a Christmas movie to top off the evening. What a blessing it is to have such wonderful inlaws.
This was the first Thanksgiving my family has been apart, my brother in Utah with his wife, and mom and dad at the hospital with Mimi. What a precious thing my mother did for her sweet mom, made her favorite meal and brought her china to MD Anderson for a Thanksgiving meal.
I am grateful for our new family addition, Bailey. He and Lola certainly entertain us and keep us on our toes. It's like sibling rivalry with our dogs. I am so thankful they are here to keep me company as Jacob is traveling.
I am grateful for my country, for the freedoms that I don't even think twice about, but exercise daily. I am thankful that God is in control and that He's calling His children to him in America and countries who don't have religious freedom. I am thankful that for now we still say, "one nation under God."
I am thankful for my husband, for his ability to love me like no one else can. I am thankful that he gets me and cherishes me and every quality of mine. I am thankful for how hard he works and how he provides for us. I am thankful that he sees the woman that I can be and encourages me to love Christ more. I am blessed by his joy, strength, and love.
I am thankful for God's redemption in my life. I am thankful for the cross and salvation, all which I could not obtain on my own. I am thankful for grace that abounds. I am thankful for tender mercies and that He longs for me. I am thankful that he is the great romancer, and speaks to my heart with words that fill me with joy and strength. I am thankful that he loves me deeply and laughs when I laugh, weeps when I weep. He is good, he is faithful, he is worth everything.
So many things I am thankful for this holiday, my first holiday with my wonderful husband.
I am incredibly grateful for my health, each day brings new healing, renewal, strength, joy, hope, and perspective. I can't take one day of energy for granted. I feel like a new woman with enough energy to outlast even my husband. God is so good. The Lord has provided people in my life to help me get well, it's amazing!
I am grateful for my family and for my new family. We spent T-day with Jacob's parents this year and his mother and I cooked up a storm. I think we even killed her new ovens. What a sweet memory it will always be, and hopes for many more to come. We each prayed at dinner, and she prayed for my Mimi and cried as she prayed. She is close to my grandmother, as everyone that meets Mimi falls in love with her. Overall, it was a success with a Christmas movie to top off the evening. What a blessing it is to have such wonderful inlaws.
This was the first Thanksgiving my family has been apart, my brother in Utah with his wife, and mom and dad at the hospital with Mimi. What a precious thing my mother did for her sweet mom, made her favorite meal and brought her china to MD Anderson for a Thanksgiving meal.
I am grateful for our new family addition, Bailey. He and Lola certainly entertain us and keep us on our toes. It's like sibling rivalry with our dogs. I am so thankful they are here to keep me company as Jacob is traveling.
I am grateful for my country, for the freedoms that I don't even think twice about, but exercise daily. I am thankful that God is in control and that He's calling His children to him in America and countries who don't have religious freedom. I am thankful that for now we still say, "one nation under God."
I am thankful for my husband, for his ability to love me like no one else can. I am thankful that he gets me and cherishes me and every quality of mine. I am thankful for how hard he works and how he provides for us. I am thankful that he sees the woman that I can be and encourages me to love Christ more. I am blessed by his joy, strength, and love.
I am thankful for God's redemption in my life. I am thankful for the cross and salvation, all which I could not obtain on my own. I am thankful for grace that abounds. I am thankful for tender mercies and that He longs for me. I am thankful that he is the great romancer, and speaks to my heart with words that fill me with joy and strength. I am thankful that he loves me deeply and laughs when I laugh, weeps when I weep. He is good, he is faithful, he is worth everything.
Monday, November 3, 2008
New Chapter for Us
Today is the start of a new chapter for us, a chapter I would like to refer to as Learning to Live Alone Again....Four Days A Week! Yes, my husband has started on a project in Pittsburgh and will be traveling every week, leaving on Sunday nights and back on Thursday nights. Pittsburgh=the pits! Pun intended! I knew this day would come with J being a consultant, but I didn't know it would come as our 9mth anniversary present!
In all honesty, it's really hard but we know God has a plan in this season of our lives. This is week 1 and I feel like May is ages away (he will be done in May). I have to admit that this is the first time in my life that I have don't have "what's next" planned and perfected. Our lease is up at the end of December and we aren't fully sure where we will be in this interim. Friends, can I tell you that I am OK with it! Praise Him! I have such a peace and I just know the Lord is with me. My sweet friend, Amy, has been such an inspiration to me as she has been walking this path for the past months while Eric is away for his new job. I love how sisters in Christ can be so real with each other, and open about their pain, struggles, triumphs! She is such an encouragement to me! Thank you my sister!
I refuse to let the enemy convince me that I am alone. I am not, my God is with me! I have nothing to fear because we are in the will of the Most High God! What a safe and beautiful place to be! And of course, I have Lola with me and she is good company and she's a close second to a cuddling with my man.
On a good note, I am feeling SO great! I am just beyond grateful for my health and the great blessings we have found as we have journeyed through the wilderness. I start working out with my trainer again next week and I can't wait! I can't wait to have my strength back again.
In all honesty, it's really hard but we know God has a plan in this season of our lives. This is week 1 and I feel like May is ages away (he will be done in May). I have to admit that this is the first time in my life that I have don't have "what's next" planned and perfected. Our lease is up at the end of December and we aren't fully sure where we will be in this interim. Friends, can I tell you that I am OK with it! Praise Him! I have such a peace and I just know the Lord is with me. My sweet friend, Amy, has been such an inspiration to me as she has been walking this path for the past months while Eric is away for his new job. I love how sisters in Christ can be so real with each other, and open about their pain, struggles, triumphs! She is such an encouragement to me! Thank you my sister!
I refuse to let the enemy convince me that I am alone. I am not, my God is with me! I have nothing to fear because we are in the will of the Most High God! What a safe and beautiful place to be! And of course, I have Lola with me and she is good company and she's a close second to a cuddling with my man.
On a good note, I am feeling SO great! I am just beyond grateful for my health and the great blessings we have found as we have journeyed through the wilderness. I start working out with my trainer again next week and I can't wait! I can't wait to have my strength back again.
Monday, October 13, 2008
Update on Mimi
Thank you for your prayers! The Lord is good! Mimi doesn't have carcinoma, but lymphoma. This is good because we can start chemo right away and hopefully put it in remission. She has her first appointment with the oncologist at MD Anderson is tomorrow, so we'll know more about the extent of her treatment then. She is back at home and her sister is staying with her. She had a stint put in her kidney before she left the hospital. She is still losing blood, so please pray for her strength. I know she has a fight ahead of her. I spent some time in the chemo lab when I needed iron injections. It's an amazing place, full of life! I met some of the most amazing people there. I am praying for a friend, a godly friend to fight with her. I believe God is doing something in our family through this. More updates to come.......
"The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold." Psalm 18:2
"The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold." Psalm 18:2
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Promises
Life can be so very hard, but thank the Lord it's only a "blink of an eye." Sometimes, life feels so fragile and fleeting, then I remember that our hearts are set in eternity.
I am eagerly awaiting the phone call from my mother about what type of cancer my Mimi has. We learned yesterday that it's not only in her stomach, but has spread to other areas. It's been going on for a long time. One type will be treatable, another will take her life. So hard! Yet, I know the Lord is with her this morning, as He always has been. I pray for peace and grace to rest over her! I pray that the Lord spares her life if it's His will! I know He's holding her up with his "righteous right hand."
There are many around her that don't have the same hope. It's so hard for people to understand a God who would allow such a wonderful lady to be struck with a horrible, devastating disease. But those who have a hope, know that the Lord allows suffering and we don't always know why, but we do know that it's to bring glory to His name. He is God, He is good. He promises to never leave us, and I know He's been faithful to that promise!
Please pray for Mimi and pray for my family!
I am eagerly awaiting the phone call from my mother about what type of cancer my Mimi has. We learned yesterday that it's not only in her stomach, but has spread to other areas. It's been going on for a long time. One type will be treatable, another will take her life. So hard! Yet, I know the Lord is with her this morning, as He always has been. I pray for peace and grace to rest over her! I pray that the Lord spares her life if it's His will! I know He's holding her up with his "righteous right hand."
There are many around her that don't have the same hope. It's so hard for people to understand a God who would allow such a wonderful lady to be struck with a horrible, devastating disease. But those who have a hope, know that the Lord allows suffering and we don't always know why, but we do know that it's to bring glory to His name. He is God, He is good. He promises to never leave us, and I know He's been faithful to that promise!
Please pray for Mimi and pray for my family!
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